You seek to find ways to build trust in a relationship again after being lied to or how to trust someone again after cheating. We would also love to know how you work on trust in your relationship because trust is essential to every relationship. To build trust in a relationship again, you need to understand what trust is and the role it plays in a relationship.
10 Ways to Build Trust In a Relationship Again
Trust is the bedrock of every relationship, without trust there would be no relationship at all. Trust points to the question of whether the partners are faithful to one another, trust within a relationship implies much more. All relationships are built on trust in the other person’s true intention.
Mistrust could be in various forms which causes strain in a relationship aside from cheating and lying to one another.
If a party in a relationship is not truthful and does not keep to his words, lack of trust in a relationship does not always occur due to dishonesty, when a party does not believe his/her partner has his interest at heart or feels the same way towards him mistrust creeps into the relationship. In this case, one may have a feeling that someone you love or trust does not feel the same way towards you and may someday betray and dump you.
Most times mistrust occurs in a relationship when one partner is not keeping to their promises and demonstrating they are trustworthy through their actions.
Some mistrust occurs as a result of pre-existing conditions; for instance when you have been repeatedly betrayed in your previous relationship and exposed to pain while others are created due to actions of you or your partner. Once you begin questioning your partner‘s intention and commitment, it can take significant effort to save the relationship
If you are saddled with trust issues in your relationship and you want to build trust in your relationship again, here are 10 tips to rebuilding trust in a relationship and put your relationship on a strong pillar
An apology is an underrated relationship tool that can bring healing, peace and relief stress in case of misunderstanding.
Some people feel shamed by apologizing while others feel shame until they’ve apologized. A sincere apology will let your partner know you’re not proud of what you did and you won’t be repeating what you did, when apologizing do not justify your action, don’t claim that you were misunderstood, recognize the fact you’ve hurt him/her.
Apologizing opens up doors to communication and allows you to reconnect with your partner. It allows you express regret that they’ve been hurt which really shows you really care about their feelings, apologizing can help your partner feel safer with you again
2. Do not keep secrets
If you want to build trust in a relationship, secrets should not be kept. You should be open to your partner. Trust requires openness, avoid being vague. Keeping secrets wear away the trust in a relationship so fast hence honesty is important. You should be upfront about issues that arise together/individually before it escalates into a complex situation.
Secrets burden the heart and require a whole lot of energy to keep it from coming out so in order to save yourself and your relationship from stress. It is always best to avoid keeping it at all because sooner or later it will be apparent to the other partner.
3. Better communication
Communication is one of the essential building blocks of trust between partners. It is also necessary for rebuilding trust in a relationship.
People in relationships that suffer from mistrust should spend more time talking and looking for ways to resolve relationship problems rather than sitting and brooding over it alone.
Communication in this sense be done physically; face to face. It shouldn’t be done over the phone calls, text or email. Instead, it should be more personal and direct without holding back anything because the relationship is personal.
You should be open about everything bothering you. This is what I call “letting out your heart“. Open communication build trust in a relationship and rebuild trust in a relationship in a situation where there is none.
4. Do what you say
No matter how little your promise is, it shouldn’t be overlooked. That presumed little disappointment could mean so much to your partner.
Things, like canceling a dinner night or failing to follow through your promise of quitting a bad behavior of cheating, can question your trustworthiness.
It might not seem to be a big deal but repeated disappointments can add up over time and cause your partner to see you as less trustworthy.
Trust requires that you are dependable and your words can be relied upon. Do not belittle your words by not keeping to them, when you keep disappointing sooner or later your words will mean nothing to your partner.
5. Tell the truth
Honesty is very essential to building trust in a relationship and honesty is shaped by the truth we say.
In most case, lies are told because It will be of benefit or sound sweet for the moment but, the truth might erupt reactions from the other partner, nevertheless no matter how lies might keep things stable someday and somehow the truth will come out and create a big disappointment on your part.
If you can tell the truth at your own expense, it shows that you set your personal and selfish interest aside and place your relationship above them which is the major aim of having a relationship.
If you lie once you will have to remember your story or lie again and if you keep lying your partner will start to notice. You wish to know what this action will cost you?
It will cost you the trust in your relationship and afterward it will cost you the entire relationship.
The truth costs you nothing to say. Maybe, it might not be sweet to hear but saying the truth won’t hurt you in a long run.
6. Be consistent
If you are reading this post so as to build trust in a relationship again, then you need to be consistent in your behavior, actions and what you mean and do after your partner must have forgiven you.
You need not be predictable all the time, but to an extent, your actions and words should be dependable. This makes your partner feel safe and confident knowing that you have their interest at heart. It builds a strong feeling of confidence and security.
It is important for your partner to feel a sense of predictability and reliability in the relationship instead of your attitude always springing out surprises and this can create doubts and at the long run creates a misunderstanding that will regenerate into mistrust again.
7. Forgive yourself
Through a repentant heart is a necessary part of making up for your betrayal, you also need to accept and learn to forgive yourself for putting effort into making amends.
You may feel regretful and have a hard time forgiving yourself for violation of your partner’s trust but you have got to understand that everybody makes mistake.
No one is perfect, your mistakes only reveal you are human in nature, accept your failure and push forward clinging to past failure will only make you devalue yourself.But never repeat the same mistake again if you are truly sorry for your actions.
8. Make your life transparent for your partner
Aside from being consistent and saying the truth at all time, you need to make your life transparent so as to eliminate any form of doubt.
For a while, your privacy has to be forfeited for the sake of the person trying to trust you again. When you make your life transparent your partner will be able to observe and see you are no longer on the path of betrayal anymore.
Let your movement and activities be known to your partner. This will save you more mistrust than it will inconvenience you.
9. Stay patient
You need to understand that rebuilding trust in a relationship sure takes a whole lot of time. You have got to be patient with your partner and persistent in your effort to rebuild trust.
Do not pressure your partner into trusting you. You need to understand things may never be the same after the betrayal but if you can achieve a level of trustworthiness a little trust can be revived and with some consistency of dependable behavior, your partner will get to keep his or her trust in you.
10. Expect an emotional reaction from your partner
After betrayal or the emergence of mistrust in a relationship, there is bound to be an emotional outburst.
Actions such as yelling, crying and mood swing from your partner even after admitting your wrong deeds is imminent.
You should know that admitting you were wrong won’t subside things immediately. Its normal for your partner to express her inner pain, Not forgetting that the best way to move on is by putting it all into the open.
So while your partner expresses his or her pain, you should reaffirm your love for him or her and let your partner know that it is a mistake you will never make in your life anymore.
In conclusion, either you wish to build trust in a relationship again or you are on the steps of rebuilding trust in a relationship, you should know that it takes time and devotion to achieve. Following the points we outlined here will definitely help you build trust in your relationship again.